Friday, February 12, 2010

heavy heart

I write with a heavy heart without really knowing what to write. My friend H was scheduled to bring home her son through domestic adoption today and has discovered that the birthmother has not signed her termination papers as planned yesterday. I don't take sides...H knew it wasn't 100% certain...all of us adopting know how the process works and all the potential regrets. I also fully believe in the rights of birthmoms. I can't fathom what they go through. It is actually unconceivable to me. I have never been able to wrap my mind around that. I just feel the weight of the situation on both sides.

As I continue to wait for the day I receive that call, I still can't envision what the experience will be like for us. We have been waiting 17 months and 8 days for a potential "match." We started the process well over a year before that approal date. It is a journey you can't wrap your mind around if you have not been in the same shoes. It is hard on you as a person, your marriage and your friends and family who hope and pray and love you all the way through!

Prayers for H today, please!


Melba said...

I know. It's tough to watch while there is so much turmoil for an adoption sister. Something about this process connects in ways that are actually a little hard to understand.

But I also understand and agree with your comments about birth mothers as well. We all do go into this process taking a calculated risk with the knowledge that there is no guarantee.

Still though, it is hard so I understand why you're feeling sad. Hang in there!


Froggycarmen said...

No one can imagine the internal debate you go through when you choose to give your child up, or when you choose to keep them, thereby denying someone else the right at parenthood. Nor can anyone understand the emotional and physical toil on a person whom is unable to have their own children. I have been on both sides of this battle, and I completely sympathize. My heart goes out to you, and all those in your position.