Friday, November 20, 2009

On the adoption front...

We received an email today asking us our permission for our profile to be shown which is weird because our agency doesn't operate that way anymore. It turned out to be an odd situation. The Birthmom is actually part of MTV's show 16 and pregnant. So by agreeing to be shown we would then agree to say yes if we were chosen. By agreeing to do those to things we would have to sign many legal releases and be filmed for television! Wow! Talk about your odd email's. Those don't happen everyday. We had until 3 this afternoon to decide.

So what are you thinking? Crazy, huh? Would you do it?

We decided that we did not want to be shown. To me that is adding to many layers to an already difficult situation. In the past, we have been open to being shown anytime we have gotten a call but there is no way I could live out those moments of my life on television!

I had a pit in my stomach over it even though my gut reaction was "no." I felt like I was passing up an opportunity and I beat myself up. I thought - You could have had a baby! Then I thought, how pathethic, Jennifer? Are you so desperate that you would do something that feels wrong in your heart of hearts...something you know you don't want to do?! I would actually enter into a legal agreement and let the world watch my experince on MTV!? So I feel good about the decision we made.

So if we were chosen, which was never a guarantee, we would have had a baby before Christmas. Can you believe that? What a gift that would have been, huh? So - today was a very bizarre day. I just thought I would share with you guys....

5 comments:

TXMom2B said...

Wow. There is no way I could have been willing to go through the whole process on TV! I can't even imagine what that would be like. Good for you!

KT said...

I would have said 'no thanks' as well. Don't get me wrong, we all want a child, but that is just not the right way of doing it for a lot of us!

gavin richardson said...

that is a tough call. for the birth mom being on mtv is probably a financial benefit, but i can't see how tv makes any of an adoption more helpful.

H said...

Wow! That is really crazy! And you only had a few hours to decide? I agree, it would be REALLY hard to have the whole thing played out on tv. I'm glad you went with your gut...which I'm sure was difficult.

I just saw your last post, too...my blog list got deleted and I hadn't seen it yet! I'm pretty sure you're a better woman than I am as far as running into people who already have their babies. Honestly, I probably WOULD run in the other direction...it's easier. I will NEVER say to you that it will happen when it's supposed to happen...that's just annoying. I AM praying for you still, and I'm hoping God gives you peace about the entire agency thing. I still wonder about that too, since this whole process is far from over for us...should we get out there a little more, like signing with another agency? Can we even BE signed with two agencies at once? I have no clue. Glad to know what's going on with you...we really do need to get together soon! You're in my prayers!

Melba said...

Oh gees, what a crazy situation! I cannot imagine going through all the ups and downs of emotions that inevitably come with this process in front of a TV filming crew. I think the drama and stress would be WAY too much!

I think it's great also that you went with you gut, and that you were able to make peace with that. While we were waiting, there was only one time we chose not to be shown, and it was hard for me. I later found out that situation had resulted in a failed match for the adoptive couple involved and it made me feel really sad for them. You absolutely must follow your instincts where all this is concerned...it's the only way!

I am thinking of you, and hoping for the best!

Melba